Far Removed

I am not emotionless.  I am far away from others, but I am not infinitely distant.  I do have some insights into people.  At least I think I do. People are patterns.  The self is a neuroanatomical process that is limited by the organization of neurons and by available experience.  Insofar as the self can be defined, these limits define it.  Any limited system can be learned to some degree with close, dispassionate observation; thus its functioning can be anticipated.  People are predictable up to a point, and generally beyond that point they drown. As I may have said before my therapist has suggested that my art isn't well received because I can't connect with people emotionally.  But why should that be?  Because I have no emotions?  No.  Because I process emotion intellectually?  Perhaps.  But I assert that considering emotion through logic doesn't mean that my emotions don't register. Maybe other people are having ...

Lying is important in allistic conversation.  But lying confuses me.  People often lie to be polite.  But it isn't polite to lie to me. This isn't a moral or an ethical issue.  I already have significant communication impediments, and lying adds another barrier to understanding.  It destabilizes interactions by introducing unpredictability.  I can't guess whether or not someone is likely to lie, and I can't begin an interaction if I don't know how it's going to proceed.  If someone lies once, maybe they will always lie.  Or maybe they never will again.  Or maybe whether they might lie depends on a system of factors so complex that I can't hope to understand it.  Lying to me, even to be polite, will always cause a misunderstanding.  I cannot be led along a path of lies to the truth.  I will always lose my way.  That is: I will make the wrong inference.  Knowing this, when confronted with implications I refuse to infe...